Old habits are hard to break. I smoked for years and tried several times to quit until I finally found success. What a relief to finally put it behind me and not smell like smoke all the time. It felt great. Some habits are more like an addiction I guess. I even smoked weed for several years. That was more of a habit and routine because I liked the effects of it. Relaxing qualities, but made you cough and wasn’t good for your lungs. Alcohol is an addiction especially if you got into the habit of drinking too much too often. Over eating is a bad habit. I’ve been in that trap. Too much coffee is not good and I do have a habit of drinking too much of it. Driving too fast, cussing, chewing gum, Facebook, working too much, and being lazy would be a very bad habit. Over spending, not brushing your teeth or washing your hands, never saying thank you, and I could go on and on and on. All of these habits can be stopped, curbed, slowed down and under control all for the best. Sometimes we have habits that are really good and there’s no reason to stop. Telling somebody good morning with cheer before they’ve had their coffee may not be the best idea for some folks, so discretion is advised.

This is the sad side of some habits that I never had any intention of stopping. They stopped because the one I loved died. It was my wife. We were married 46 years. We had habits of saying I love you, good morning, good night, you need anything?, I sure am glad I married you, I sure did enjoy dinner, we would sit together, discuss together, eat together, and those things married couples do out of habit because they’re in love. Those intimate nights spent together was an awesome habit. Always wanting to kiss was also a great habit. Staying up late and binge watching a show was fun. Talking about how the reality shows were staged. I say all this because I always had a habit while driving, of stretching out my right arm palm side up toward Mary. Mary would naturally, always reach over and place her hand in mine. Now, I don’t have that habit anymore and It wasn’t by choice, it was taken away. So now, sometimes when I’m driving I still reach out, imagine, and go through the same motions. Just like I did today. My heart breaks and wants so bad to feel her hand in mine again. To feel the touch of her palm, her fingers, her wedding bands, her wrist, and her arm as I would lift it up to my lips and kiss the back of her hand. She was so soft, and so delicate. I would love to feel her wedding bands against my fingers again. This was just an old habit that I had. Old habits are hard to break I guess.